Abstinence from the white stuff

Right now, today, I’m struggling with addictions: Food, overwork, negative feelings and spending. These are the things I identify today which are getting in the road of my life. For instance next week I’m about to start teaching a yoga class. I have never done this before, since I finished my training over a week ago. I have a lot of fear about being good enough, being judged and all of a sudden I find myself eating all the time, and consequently feeling sluggish all the time. I have eaten half a packet of mint slices before lunch, and a snack of bread, tahini and honey after lunch. I didn’t need the extra food, but I couldn’t not have it. There’s always the rationalisation that tomorrow I’ll give it up, banish it from my cupboards. But the day never comes. Or if it is does, then I manage for a week or two (feel like I'm top of it this time), but then I’m right back off track, and more and more demoralised.
I know that all my compulsions feed into one another. I know that if I can just let go of these things one day at a time, I will be in a better position to confront the real issues of my life – my family relationships and friendships, my kids, our debt, our future.
Today I’m tired. Tired of fighting the compulsion. Tired of the merry-go-round of addiction, always destined to keeping getting back on the ride, which takes me nowhere. It was suggested that I just say to myself ‘not right now’ when faced with my drug of choice. Not right now. Sure, in an hour’s time, or tomorrow, or next month, but not right now. I know I need to cement this into my psyche, because I am prone to forgetting when the right justification presents itself.
I like the idea of making a journal of my progress. To communicate with my higher self, or communicate with others the journey I make in letting go of these defects of my character.
I’ve been told to not try to do everything all at once, but to just tackle the biggest problem first. The biggest problem I see right now is sugar. Sugar is killing my powers of concentration, making me irritable and moody, destroying my energy and my health. I can feel it in my body. But to let go of it is the hardest thing I possibly have ever done. Everyone around me consumes vast quantities of the stuff, the media constantly shoves it down our throat (excuse the pun)! There is no escaping the insidious white powder. But it’s not just the white stuff. It lurks in a myriad of other forms – malt, malt syryp, maple syrup, fructose, corn syrup, glucose, honey, brown sugar, raw sugar etc etc, There is no escaping the stuff. Or is there. That's what I want to explore here... without depriving myself.